Keep your head held high; if you got one
Barry Friedman at Large
Not worth the extended paper it’s written on Even before beating Ball State in the GMAC Bowl (and considering GM’s economic troubles, shouldn’t this be renamed the Taxpayers’ Bailout Bowl?), The University of Tulsa gave head coach Todd Graham a 10-year contract extension … or until Indiana, Oregon State or Texas Tech hires him away. If you remember, Graham’s predecessor, Steve Kragthorpe, also received an extension — as did TU basketball coaches Steve Robinson, Bill Self and Tubby Smith.
But what about the 106 we got right? Concerning January’s “Top 108 People of 2008” list, our At Large ombudsman has informed us that Ann Smith is executive director for Neighbor for Neighbor, and Jay Anderson is president of the Indian Health Care Resource Center. For their good works, past and present, we’re still including Diane Perkins and Cindy Martin on, now, our “Top 110 of 2008” list.
Should be easy to spot him What’s fascinating about the story of the man who robbed the BOK branch inside the Food Pyramid Jan. 24 was not that he wore a black mask and three lights on his forehead, but that police reported he was approximately 5 foot 8 inches and 180 pounds.
Was the additional information really necessary?
Problem is, Harold, dealing with a headless clerk can be equally as maddening After learning he needed his actual birth certificate to renew his license, Harold Groves threatened to blow the heads off everyone at a Bartlesville tag agency.
Can you say “anger management”?
Groves was charged with a misdemeanor count of threatening violence and then, we hope, given a copy of his arrest report.
Mr. Orwell, your car Because of a newfangled device, Oklahoma’s Department of Central Services will be able to track odometer readings, gas mileage, potential breakdowns and the location of every Oklahoma-issued car or truck.
The At Large procurement office will miss the unexpected drop-ins from state employees in their state vehicles playing hooky from their state jobs.
(Psst: We’ll meet you somewhere.)
At Large Dumb Criminal of the Month Last month, a man recently released from prison was pulled over at 4:30 a.m. because he was driving without his lights on.
Police discovered the man was in a stolen truck and then re-arrested him.
Note to all recently released inmates in stolen vehicles: The point is to not call attention to yourselves, so if you’re driving in the middle of the night without your lights on, even a mall cop is going to think, “This is odd.”
Death to cosmetologists! Rep. Gary Banz (R-Midwest City) has proposed legislation protecting barbers and their red, white and blue poles. Apparently, other hair and beauty care professionals have been using them to attract customers.
Banz’s barber, Leroy Tucker (Aha! The all-powerful barbershop lobby is behind this), says the spiraling rods are an integral and proprietary part of barbershop lore.
The legislation states that any person, other than a licensed barber, using poles shall first be warned and then fined between $500 and $1,000 — no doubt depending on the size and rotation.
(Incidentally, the At Large salon and spa director has been suspended without pay and her pole has been turned off pending further review.)
Another reason to fire Stoops Before the BCS Championship game, Sens. Tom Coburn (R-Oklahoma) and Bill Nelson (D-Florida) made a bet. Had OU won, Nelson would have serenaded Coburn with “Oklahoma!” Because it didn’t, Coburn had to sing “Rocket Man” to Nelson, a former astronaut.
Irony upon ironies: Tom Coburn, who once called the gay community “the greatest threat to our freedom,” performing a song by Elton John, who once said, “There is nothing wrong with going to bed with somebody of your own sex … they should draw the line at goats.”
And the GOP woes continue.
Eavesdroppings At Tulsa County Courthouse, a woman defending her son’s intelligence reminded his attorney, “You know, he ain’t stupid.”