Email
PrintBarry Friedman at Large
What a long, strange, impassable trip it’s been.
Why some banners get plastered in graffiti.
Outside a local allergy clinic, we saw this sign: Celebrating 50 Years of Service.
There are mold spores and ragweed doing the merengue in my sinuses and clinic personnel are whooping it up?
Bite me!
Eavesdroppings
“She carved a cross in her arm to prove she was a Christian? Is that in the Bible?”
The story that keeps giving
Jarrett Lake, who was sort of enrolled at Jenks High School and sort of responsible for coach Allan Trimble getting suspended and sort of committed to The University of Oklahoma, stood at a press conference with someone who was sort of his father and announced he was going to attend school at the University of Arkansas.
A list we didn’t make
The Animal Legal Defense Fund — yes, there is one — issued a report listing the five states with the worst animal protection laws, and Oklahoma … wasn’t on it. Oh, we’re still hanging tough when it comes to rates of teen pregnancy, obesity and lax gun laws, but by God, our pooches have dedicated parks.
Dumb Criminal of the Month
The man who stole the tip jar from Mario’s Pizzeria.
Apparently, the man then took the jar, which he hid in a brown paper bag (brilliant!), and went next door to Crawpappy’s for a cocktail.
Unfortunately for our DCOM:
1) There were off-duty cops eating dinner at Mario’s who saw the heist, and
2) The cop who made the arrest found, while apprehending the suspect, his own credit card receipt, you guessed it, inside the jar.
Stop that cliché
Commenting on former OSU basketball coach Sean Sutton’s arrest on drug charges, Doug Gottlieb, a former Cowboys basketball player and now with ESPN, said, “You think when you lose your career and maybe your dream job that it would wake you up. But this (arrest) would obviously have to wake you up.”
The worst dog owner in the world
A sign on a telephone pole at 36th Street and Harvard Avenue bemoaned the loss of two Scottish terriers. You lost two of them? OK, one maybe jumps the fence in the back yard and runs away with the neighbor’s schnauzer, but how do you explain both, Cesar?
Eavesdroppings, Part II
“Why are they always digging up s**t in Tulsa?”
Another good reason, aside from closing the budget gap, for turning off the lights on area roadways
You won’t be able to see the roads and bridges crumbling beneath your vehicle.
Sightings
Outside Panera Bread, 15th Street and Utica Avenue, U.S. Congressman John Sullivan (Rep.) talking with defeated Tulsa mayoral candidate Tom Adelson (Dem.).
Possible exchange:
Sullivan: What a year, huh?
Adelson: Tell me about it.
And all the suspects out there named Warren or Cheryl with matching tattoos are thinking, “How can I compete with this?”
A woman, whose first name is Waunderful but has the name Tawanda tattooed on her arm, was named Tulsa Police Department’s Weekly Wanted Suspect on Feb. 22 because of a first-degree robbery charge.
The physical bruises may heal, but the emotional scars will last forever.
In February, a man who attacked patrons in a Tulsa strip club with a shovel was taken to a hospital.
That’s right, the guy with the shovel — that guy — was injured.
How does that happen? You have the garden tool, those at the club have rolled-up dollar bills and you get hurt?
I would have been so humiliated that I would have refused treatment.
Ups and downs
UP District Judge Daniel L. Owens for ruling that an anti-abortion bill passed by the state Legislature was unconstitutional, in part because it combined four onerous provisions, including forcing women who choose abortion to have ultrasounds and to divulge private information on a public Web site.
DOWN Every member of the Oklahoma House who, days later, voted in favor of those onerous provisions again, but this time individually.
UP Ziva Branstetter, Tulsa World city editor, who, along with her paper, sued the Oklahoma Highway Patrol for release of public records that the OHP was holding onto like a 3-year-old with a Blow Pop. Last month, the Department of Public Safety announced it was reimbursing the paper for legal expenses associated with the filing of the suit.
